Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Happy FREAKIN' New Year!!!!

All humanity is lost! We’ve become a decadent self-centered society who could barely give a damn about anyone else (unless someone else is watching and it becomes publicly expedient)! What brings on this tirade? Today I had an appointment with my OB. I think I’ve mentioned in previous entries that my doc’s office is roughly 45 mins away. I stuck with my OB because I know, love and trust him. So all my doc appointments are out in Gaithersburg and my delivery will be too.

So, I’m off the doc on this fine morning. There is a beautiful drive through Rock Creek Park that I like to take that ends just a bit before I reach the highway. However, today that drive was not so nice! There is a severe wind advisory out with gusts up to 40 mph. The drive on Beach drive through Rock Creek Park proved to be a gauntlet! Trees were down everywhere and falling all around me! Just as I’m making it to the end of Rock Creek, just before the road starts to widen a bit a giant tree limb, easily a foot in diameter and roughly 4 feet long falls directly in front of the car. I slam on the breaks to avoid it hitting the car, but I didn’t quite stop fast enough as I still managed to roll over the limb and get it lodged under the car. I could hear it scraping and smell it burning. I pulled to the side of the road as best I could – there is really no shoulder on this road. Meanwhile, the jerk behind me has the nerve to honk frantically at me and rips around me with screeching tires as he passes and takes off. I look for more traffic and wait while 4 more cars drive past. Nice, very neighborly.

I get out and go to the front of the car and look under to see this enormous tree branch (tree TRUNK! is more like it) lodged under the car. I can’t reach it from the front. More cars come around the bend and honk at me as they pass…really…what the hell was going on?! There is no shoulder, I’m over as far as I can get, hazard lights on and I can’t pull into the grass because the ground drops off. I go to the passenger side of the car to see if I can reach the tree branch from there. Let me remind you I’m a VERY LARGE 7 months pregnant, getting up and down is a challenge let alone getting the strength and ability to reach under a car to pull out a lodged tree TRUNK! I can’t reach it from the passenger side. More cars pass, more honking. I’m close to tears.

I try calling my husband to get him to look up a number of whoever you call to get tree trunks dislodged from under your car. He doesn’t answer…probably in the basement playing with our son. Now I am crying as yet even more cars honk and pass me by. It’s freezing outside, but I decide if someone drives by and sees that I’m pregnant they might stop to help. Since just being a stranded woman in the woods didn’t seem to work. I take the coat off, thinking it was just making me look fat rather than pregnant. The empire waisted sweater I had on definitely showed my condition off very well. I carefully approach the driver’s side of the car watching for cars in both directions…since the road is so narrow I was risking getting hit by either side. I crouch down to look and of course lose my balance and fall over. I cry some more. NOW….it starts to SLEET! Just then a car comes around the bend behind me…is he slowing? Oh thank god…yes…he’s slowing down but not to help me, he slowed just to look at me crawling off the ground and speeds off - yes, he actually had to drive over in the opposing traffic lane to get around and pass me. WHAT THE HELL?!!!!!!!! I’m just a miserable crying mess at this point.

I can hear more cars coming as I am making my way off the ground and around to the front of the car. The front car was coming around the bend so fast that he had to slam on his breaks and slid to a stop behind me. He honks, and honks and honks… Does he want me to move my car?! Does he think I’ve stopped here just to check out the scenery?! He throws his car in reverse, throws it in drive (I say throw because I can see his car lunging forward with the gear shifts) and tears around me; and takes the time to roll down his window to scream something inaudible at me! I had had it…I scream back, give him the bird and yell “thanks for helping the pregnant woman stranded on the side of the road!!!!”.

I’m beyond feeling sorry for myself at this point and wait while more cars pass, then I sit on my butt on the ground on the drivers side again and, ignoring the sharp sheering pains shooting up my stomach, I kick and kick and kick at the tree stump until I feel it loosen – then, ignoring even more pain, I get on my stomach (God did it hurt) and yank the tree trunk out. I hear a car coming…god, he can’t see me, I think. I jump up as fast as my giant, pregnant belly will allow, leaving the tree stump. The car passes me; I think to myself…Karma better exist and it better bight these people on the ass! I get back down on the ground and yank the stump out. I drag it off the road and wait while even more cars pass. I get in the car and cry in relief! I would guess that roughly 20 to 30 cars passed me this morning. Not a single soul stopped to ask if I was OK! I made it to my doc appointment 30 mins late, disheveled and dirty and got an extra thorough going-over when I told the nurse about my morning. She got a shorter version than this.

I sure hope none of you would ever pass up a pregnant woman stranded on the road….and if any of you were the ones passing me by this morning…. I take solace that you will get yours!!!
The picture above of Beach Drive in Rock Creek Park I retrieved from a Wikipedia article about Rock Creek Park.

Friday, December 12, 2008

All I want for Christmas

My husband, from day one, has never ever hidden the fact that he doesn’t remember “important” dates, he hates giving flowers, and if I had something in particular I wanted as a gift – it’s best to tell him exactly what it is and say the words “I would like you to give it to me as a gift”, small hints like “I really like that, I sure wish I had it” wouldn’t hit home. That last one, as our relationship grew and I moved in with him, became “If you’d like me to get you something in particular as a gift, go buy it and I’ll pay you back”. Admittedly, this is not the most romantic portion of our relationship – I’ll just say that he more than makes up for this (in my mind) minor issue with soo, sooo … many other things!!!

So this year when Christmas rolled around, I really, honestly, thought I was going easy on the guy when I told him all I really want for Christmas is a simple watch, silver colored bracelet, modest in size, no diamonds or anything, with numbers actually printed on the face. That’s it. It seems, this watch could not be found! He said, well, I found a $15 Timex that matches that description, but I can’t give you a $15 watch as a gift! That kind of made me smile. First of all, he actually LOOKED for the watch and second even discerned that a cheap watch wasn’t the way to go! So, I said I’d find the one I wanted and let him know where to get it.

Well, for heaven’s sake I couldn’t find it either. Now if I had said, All I want for Christmas is large, gold, gawdy, watch encrusted with large diamonds and the designer’s logo plastered all over it and as large as possible… neither of us would have had to look very far. I’m positive this fits someone’s style, just really not mine. I finally resorted to a Google-search searching in the images section. Wham! I found it! The EXACT watch I wanted, exactly as I had pictured it in my mind (Pictured at the top of the article). So I click the image and view closer and find that it’s a Cartier watch. Well, I thought let’s go to the Cartier website and see how much it is. After all, how much could it possibly be with no diamonds, simple design and band?! Cartier, it seems, does not post it’s prices on-line. There’s a shop by my mom’s house in Chevy Chase, I thought, I’ll just pop in one day before Christmas and check it out. Then, I thought, I’m likely to talk myself into buying it no matter the price…better to at least try to find the ballpark on-line. It didn’t take much digging, but I thought what I found just HAD to be wrong! The price on this discounter/wholesaler’s website was $13,000!!!! What the hell?! Turns out the watch is 18k white gold, but still…really that seemed excessive. I walk into Cartier to look at the watch. Seems there’s a whole line of these “Tank” watches. There’s Tank Francaise and Tank Americaine and a few others. I found one of them to be over $200,000 (it was encrusted with tiny diamonds all around the band. Oh well, looks like I better settle for a $15 Timex!

Oh, and by the way, if any of you are looking to make me a very happy woman, the exact watch I want is the “Cartier Tank Americaine” in 18kt White Gold.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Tastes and Opinions...don't we all have them?

Yesterday Peter and I headed out for the local Target. My plan was to pick up some stocking stuffers from the .99 section for Peter... and of course you know I got carried away and strayed from .99 section. I had all the toys and stocking stuffers I needed within minutes.

Still needed to fill a shopping urge I wander up to the kids' section...Peter needed some more PJs. I pick a couple of PJs I figure he'll like since he loves Monkeys these days I had a couple of monkey PJs... Then I hear from Peter yelling from his carriage..."NO!". I turned around expecting to see some woman leaning over to pinch his cheeks...yes, it happens a lot..and very often without asking me if it's OK. Now that I've learned the Latin culture is just that way with kids (at least as far as I've seen) I'm more relaxed about, it but it definitely used to get me all up in arms. In case you haven't read in my previous posts...I live in a very heavily Latin neighborhood. Anyway, that was not the case here...he seemed to be saying NO for no reason. So I continue with my shopping, chatting with Peter as I always do. How do you like these PJs, as I hold up the monkey PJs...NO! he says again..hmmm...strange... he ususally doesn't care...I point out the monkeys...No, no monkey!! he says...ok. I put them back, let him out of the stroller and let him walk with me as I hold up various PJs...over and over I get NO... I figure he's in the No-Zone until I hear "hooooo....oohhh!!!" as he sucks in his breath and points... he runs over and starts saying Choo-Choo! Choo-Choo!, pointing a set of Thomas the Train PJs... I find his size, hold up and say you want these....Da. he says (that's yes). Oh boy, I think...he's not even 2 and has his opinions already. Then I hear it again, "hooooo....oohhh!!!" sucking in his breath again. This time he's pointing at a pair of PJs that has a very 1950s cowboy theme on it. I would NEVER have picked it out for him...but I'm guessing he likes the horses. I hold up one in his size again and say you want this? Da. ok, PJs purchased I move on.

I finish my shopping and head home. I'm unpacking the bags at home being careful to keep the stocking stuffer toys out of his sight when I hear "P!...P!...P!..." It took me a bit but I finally figured out he wanted his PJs...I take them out and hand the two sets of PJs to him. He grips and hugs them like his teddy bear...he walks off mumbing P...P...P... and goes and curls up with them on the couch. Minutes later he's back at my side with the PJs in hand... "On? on?" he I say...those are for bed time. "OOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!" he screames.... of course I give in because it's easier. Yes, I realize this creates a monster... I promise myself each time I do it that next time I'll stand my ground. He insists I put on the Choo-choo PJs...he was happy after I got the on him...

This morning (still in his Choo-choo PJs by the way) he demanded I put on his 1950s-looking cowboy PJs...he's in them now playing and have a good time. :)

I have a clothes horse I think.

Friday, December 5, 2008

Will the Santa visit happen this year?

Whew! What a day! My mother was off today and decided to join us on our outting for the big Santa visit.

I had decided to go to The Shops at Georgetown, I had heard they had a great Santa with a real beard. I had also decided not to walk all the way there from my home in Mt. Pleasant which was my usual approach to reaching Georgetown. So, for my first time beyond the one bus that drives straight up 16th street to my office at Discovery, I ventured into the world of buses.

I researched on-line the bus/busses I needed to take and headed out the door. I had a few stops to make so I had planned for us to walk up to Adams Morgan and hit all my pit-stops and catch the bus across from the Starbucks (of course after picking up a hot tastey beverage). We hop on the bus and I'm sitting proud that I had figured all this out... then..... I see my neighborhood...I see my street! I look at my mom and start laughing...I tell her we got on the bus going the wrong direction! We both were cackling soooo loud, the bus driver started chatting with us, asked where we were headed and told us to stay on since the end of the line was just ahead (1 block from my house by the way). We should have just gone home.

After riding the bus out to the middle of the city and changing to the next bus my son who had been enjoying his ride on the bus was sick of it and made sure ALL the passengers on the bus knew it! There was no calming him! We got off as soon as Pennsylvania ave. merged to M Street and walked the rest of the way to mall. It's not a great distance from there to the mall and normally would have been nothing to me at all; but almost 7 months into my pregnancy all my muscles, joints and ligaments said NOOOO!!! I said nothing to my mom about the pain shooting from the small of my back, down into my right butt-cheek and straight down my right leg...I don't think she noticed me limping. We finally make it to the mall...

Imagine my great joy to find no line for Santa. NONE! Santa was bored and reading a book!!!!! Yipee!! things were turning for the better! We approach slowly knowing Peter has a fear of strangers...but it's Santa...come on ...he has jingle bells, coloring books, candy canes and fun Christmas trees all around him! yeah... none of it worked...Peter was at first not so sure and stared at Santa from the side of his eye. My son then slowly stepped backwards until he could feel my leg with his hand and then hugged my leg like mad! Ok, we stepped away and walked the mall a bit. We came back, he seemed more receptive to the idea and even took a coloring book from santa and THEN cried... sly little the good stuff and then pitches a fit.

After the fourth failed trip past Santa we gave up. I doubt I'll try again, but if it's convenient one day while out shopping and he seems receptive we'll do it. My mom says she has zero Santa photos of my sister and I before we were 6 years old for this very reason.

I'm so glad I got a photo of him with Santa last year before he knew to be scared! I'll charish it more now for sure!

PS...the pic above is Peter's Santa photo from last year.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

My Review of Spill-Proof Cap Combo Pack

Originally submitted at One Step Ahead

Now little kids can drink from grown-up juice and water bottles — without spilling! These clever spouts turn plastic beverage bottles into instant sippy cups. No spilling, no leaking if the bottle gets tipped over. Includes four screw-on caps: two for wide-mouth juice bottles and two for diff...

So far...very disappointed!

By JennRGolden from Washington, DC on 12/2/2008


1out of 5

Gift: No

Describe Yourself: First Time Parent

I could not wait to get these in...what a great idea...but so far I have not found anything they fit! Doesn't fit the apple juice we routinely buy at the local coffee house, doesn't fit the milk bottle from the happy meal at McDonalds...nothing so far... VERY DISAPPOINTED...


Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Nordstrom Maternity Sucks!

I know I’m on the large side this pregnancy…OK, I was on the large-side the last pregnancy too…and frankly I’m sick of not being able to find decent clothes in my size! I’m a size 12…that’s not HUGE for Christ’s sake! Nordstroms seems to only service up to size oooh, I guess 8! A recent search on their on-line shop yielded the following choices for size Large (12-14): 2 maternity bras, 2 types of Mama Spanx and 2 pairs of underwear. Seriously? Really? No blouses in a 12 no skirts or dresses ? Not even a t-shirt?!!! Amazing.
OK, it's just their search function that sucks...I tried searching every size choice and it always returned underwear... soo they just kind-of suck :)
----------Update II------
OK, I guess I have to take back the whole comment. Last night I spent a few hours searching all the maternity website for some major maternity underwear (such as you see in the bottom right of the photo); the only place I could find them was Nordstroms! Everyone else had bikini-type underwear...which are find for right now - but after the c-section...the top of the bikini-type underwear hit right on the sutures! ouch!!! FOr a good 3 months I need some granny-panties :D lovely, I know.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

I'm happy to thave the blues.

....because we just found out we're having another boy! Due date is still end of Feb./beginning of March.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Just follow the clues...

I love my husband, 100%! Not a doubt about it. But sometimes…I feel like he’s giving competition to our 21 month old son! I can always tell what my husband has been up to by the trail of clues.

For instance this morning: I knew the instant I came downstairs he had burned some toast, but if my nose had not been working the evidence was waiting for me on the counter top right next to the toaster. We also seemed to have emptied an orange juice container as the empty carton was sitting on the counter with the top next to it. But we clearly had more O.J. in the fridge because the pull ring for the new carton was also sitting on the counter. I know that my dear husband had Oatmeal for breakfast because that container was on the counter as well. He finished his glass of orange juice for sure, because the glass with the residue was on the counter along with his oatmeal laced bowl. He had toast, that’s been established, but if there had been any question the bread bag and tie wrap …you guessed it! were on the counter.

I can’t complain too much though, he got our son out of the bed this morning while I slept in a bit and took a shower. He changed the poop diaper, fed Peter breakfast and entertained him while I got dressed. Then my husband got to go off to work. I think that’s plenty to do before heading to work, I guess I can live with cleaning up his evidence trails.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008


Immediately after breakfast this morning (that would be about 8:00am) Peter and I left the house for the park…it is a gorgeous day here! Overcast, cool and breezy…just the way I like it!

Anyway about 1 block from the park Peter recognized where we were, got excited and started running toward the park. Of course, he fell and skinned his knee. He’s done this dozens of times and this incident was certainly no where close to the time he fell and skinned both knees and his hands…but for some reason this incident warranted a major crying fit. I sat on the sidewalk and held him, got out my little diaper bag boo-boo kit and doctored him up. He was screaming as if I was amputating him. Once we got to the park it was all forgotten. That is until we got home when he started crying, pointing at his knee and saying boo-boo over and over again.

So I decided I needed to clean it up better than we could sitting on the sidewalk. I got out his special booboo kit we keep at home (other moms & dads…you gotta get one of these – I got mine at Target; it has cute band aids, foaming anti-sting cleanser, all kinds of kid-centric stuff including a stethoscope for them to play with, and a little “mom fixed my boo-boo sticker” for them to wear when all is done, it comes in a little ambulance case)… anyway…I take the old band aid off and he starts SCREAMING and SHAKING (for heaven’s sake) all over…Christ, this kid had me worried that somehow glass was in his knee all morning or something. I got the ”wound” all cleaned up to find nothing. Nothing at all; just 4 or 5 teeny tiny little scratches not deep at all. I just looked at my screaming, crying and shaking kid put a bumble-bee (his favorite bug right now) band aid on, gave him his sticker, kissed him and put him down. He hobbled off…I’m not kidding, he hobbled away…and now he keeps limping!!!! If he wasn’t so darn cute and funny I’d be irritated…

My boy got all the drama that both my husband's family and my family has!!!!! What fun the teenage years are going to be!

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

4 months in and I'm a zombie!

I'm in full swing of my pregnancy at 4 months. I am sooo much more tired this go 'round than I was when I was pregnant with Peter. Today, I managed to fall hard asleep on the couch while my 20 month old literally ransacked the first floor of the house! What finally woke me up? The sound of a weird electronic noise and my son giggling. I found that the VCR was trying to digest a tape, but couldn't and was stuck trying to either eject or digest the tape; it was stuck on my iPod that Peter had also jammed in on top of the tape. I managed to get both the iPod and tape out. I look around the room to find that Peter had been having a blast! He had dumped the very large basket of laundry onto the floor and had strewn it all over the floor. I found clothes jammed between the radiator slats and in the windows. In dining room I found the stack of to-be-recycled newspapers had also been dumped out and strewn all over the floor. Progressing to the back of the house, to the kitchen I find a placemat thrown in the garbage, the cat food spilled out on the floor, the oven door open with some clothese shoved in.

How the hell I slept through this I don't know. I do know this, I have ULTIMATE respect for the women who manage to go to work and function normally during their pregnancy. My brain is definitely gone!!!

Thursday, August 14, 2008

My 18 month old son LOVES Crack!!!

So, Peter has discovered he likes Mommy’s Cracklin’ Oat Bran Cereal. It’s addictive cereal that my husband and I refer to as crack.

Every morning I describe to Peter what I’m doing: “Let’s get a bowl.” … “Bo” says Peter, then I say “Let’s put in the cereal, what kind do you want?”; he’ll grab the Cracklin’ Oat Bran Box and I’ll say “Ah, Crack” … This morning, clear as a bell, Peter said “Crack!” I laughed so hard. I looked at him and said “Crack?” so he said it again “Crack!”….

Friday, June 27, 2008

Pregnant Again...

It's not like we're stupid. We're both fully aware how these things happen. You see, there are the bumble bees and they go from flower to flower gathering nectar and ... actually I'm not sure I've EVER understood how birds and bees correlated to knocking up a woman. Like I said, we know how it works... so why or how we're surprised by this pregnancy is anybody's guess.

My husband and I just 5 minutes ago found out we are pregnant with our second child. Frankly, I was pretty sure of it a week ago when I could smell the human piss on the street corner (yeah, we live in the city) ... that was the tale-tale sign when I was pregnant with Peter, our first-born. I could walk down our street and with my new gift of smell distinguish between dog, cat and human pee. Now wouldn't you love to be able to do that? It's certainly not a power you find among classic or modern super heroes.

Clearly the reaction to this news is wholly different for each of us. I'm ecstatic! No other word for it. I can't stop smiling. I'm sitting here like an idiot smiling and typing. He keeps looking over at me... grinning and then shaking his head side to side. He's happy, no doubt...he's just more practical than me. I'm sure he's over there adding up the cost of a double stroller, second car seat, the fact we'll have to move because our current home can not accommodate all of us, the fact that visiting his family in Montreal just got REALLY expensive....etc. etc. etc. and I all I can think of is cute little chubby cheeks, fingers and I'm going to attack the whole sleep-training thing differently this go 'round....wondering if it's a boy or a girl... wondering if maybe I have twins! (wow, then hubby will REALLY be adding up numbers)...what names should we pick... SHOP! I need to shop for more stuff!!!