lament over not having painted in a while and how I feel there is just no time in the day/week/month to get a single painting done. I have to admit, part of that is laziness, part of it is the complete inability to be creative on demand in the minuscule amount of free time I do have, and part if is actually true there is so very little time in my day that I can't get any work done.
The winds of change are blowing through my household, however. Back in October I sold my soul and went back to work. Sounds dramatic I know, but it really felt that way at the time as my friend over at A Lil Welsh Rarebit can attest. The weekend before I was due to start working she and I took a trip out to NYC for girl talk, R&R, and shopping. We had a little R&R, a bit of shopping, a good amount of girl talk (although we're capable of far more talk than we did on that trip) and I came home knowing I had made the wrong choice to return to work. I wanted to stay home, eat pie and bonbons, take care of my kids, watch Oprah and meet girlfriends at coffee shops and talk about our kids. Most of that is NOT what happens when you are a stay at home mom, but people seem to think it is so I'm going with it...it's a goal. ha!
But I was too far down the process of background checks and security clearances for the job to back out...so on I trudged to the job I no longer wanted and just months before was so excited about. I was feeling fully I had sold my soul for a good paycheck, sold my soul and my dreams for a 9-5 job (OK it's more like a 9-8 job)...sold my kids off into daycare-slavery to be cared for by some well-meaning stranger who I just knew couldn't do anywhere near as good a job as me taking care of my kids.
Those winds of change I mentioned...through circumstances I won't get into - if all works out with my contract with the government I will be reducing my hours at work. I will be working 10a.m.-4:00 p.m. Allowing me at the very least to be able to drop my kids at daycare as well as picking them up. If the government isn't able to adjust my contract to accommodate these shortened hours I will be out of a job and at home full time with my youngest kid (trying to break the habit of calling him my baby) and I think we have found a way to pay for my oldest to stay in daycare even if I don't work.
Honestly, I have my fingers crossed that the second scenario is what takes place. Then I can eat that pie, sup on bonbons while watching Oprah, chat with girlfriends at coffee shops and maybe, just maybe find time for some painting!