I Get Drunk on Coffee & You Can Too!

It's too true, I can get loopy as hell on coffee! Here's the story:

The day I found out I was pregnant with my first son I quit … well, pretty much everything. I was an Über-mom. I quit coffee. I quite coke (the drink not cocaine – ‘cause who’d give up cocaine?! I kid…I don’t use drugs). I gave up alcohol. Everything! I made sure I got all the sleep I needed. Heck, I even improved my diet by eating really well right up until my eighth month of pregnancy when an insane craving for Marsha Marsha Marshmallow ice cream kicked in! By the way, the stuff has been taken off the market…if you can convince Ben & Jerry’s to re-institute it, well, I’d love you forever and put you in my will!!

So… after the baby was born I was breastfeeding for over a year (16 months to be exact) and naturally being Über-mom I didn’t do any of those things then either. So that was 2 years I didn’t drink anything that wasn’t juice, water or milk (didn’t even consume my beloved chocolate). Then… just a few months later I go and get knocked up again. This time, however, I allowed myself 1 cup of coffee per day and now that that delightful cherub is six months old I’m allowing myself to drink. OK, OK, I’ll be honest, I was allowing a little nip here and there almost as soon as he was out of the womb!

So now that I drink again, it’s kind of cool. I can get toasted (I mean toasted!!!!) on 3 beers! Want to know something even cooler? I can get tipsy on two cups of coffee! I’m not kidding, I get slightly dizzy, very jittery and extremely goofy on COFFEE! It’s the best! Who knew! I may do this to myself in the future too. NO! Don’t be silly…I wouldn’t get knocked up just so I can get tipsy on coffee… I mean lay off the good stuff (coffee, alcohol and chocolate) for a while so I can get an early morning buzz from my coffee! Oh yeah, I think it’s called “cleansing”. Whatever…I won’t be doing it for holistic reasons!